The Legion, otherwise known as Keeping the voices at bay....

14:04

Highlight of the Day - coffee...liquid gold.

I'm seriously thinking about changing my layout. I'm getting a little sick of people emailing me about the pink. Yeah, I know I'm not a 'pink' type of person. Thank God for that! Most of my favorite colors are dark. See the problem is, despite being quite able to design the diary myself, I know that would be a big mistake. If I were to do the design myself, I'd never be happy with it. I'd constantly want to change something. And you'd end up with a diary whose layout changed on an everyday basis. I'd spend so much time on the code that I'd never update anymore and eventually go insane.

I guess this means I'm not changing the layout.

My morning is not going well. Pink-hating emails aside, I was dragged out of bed at 10am after only 4 hours of continuous sleep (damn Legion babbling away all night). Aside from the fact that I have a nice hot cup of coffee next to me, things are not right with the world. I haven't even gotten to read the paper yet. Of course, since this is Canada, I'm surprised we even got one. After all, it is a holiday and a sunday.

Speaking of, Happy Mother's Day to all the moms I know: Lisa, Mom, my grandmother, Tarina, Susie, Monika, Diane, Josephine, Debbie, Christine, Aunt Alma (not a mom but should have been), J.(one of my boyfriend's closest friends), Jill's Mom, my boyfriend's mom, Wendi, and Saundra.

So back to what I was saying...Legion kept me awake most of the night babbling away. Not content to drive me insane through my writing, Legion has now decided to invade my non-writing thoughts as well. You'd think it was my conscience or something. Granted, the topic it was harping on about did have to do with my writing. See, I was stupid enough to write this little piece on the death of one of my main characters. I wasn't intending to kill him off. But now that the piece is written I've become more and more convinced that he had to die. But now I'm not really sure where things are going to go. Legion, of course, went on and on about how I never think these things out. And now there's this gaping black hole in the plot. What to do? Ugh...I'll think about it later. I've had quite enough on that topic for the next few days.

My writing is pretty strange. See, I have a hard time thinking in straight lines. And writing in straight lines is near impossible. I've got quite a bit of the first part of my novel written, but it's in no order whatsoever. For instance, in one particular part I introduce two of the main characters. And I wrote the introduction of those characters before I had even finished the prologue. From what I can piece together from the cess-pool behind my eyes, that scene doesn't take place for about 4 more chapters. And it's already written. Which means, if I know me, I'll have to re-write it when I get to it because I'll no doubt change something major before that point. I already know I have to change a little of it as I killed off one of the characters that was supposed to be in that scene.

I really wish my mind worked more normally. I have maybe three or four more scenes written out and they're so far ahead of where I am that I'm not even sure if they're a part of this novel or not. I'm sure I'll come to a point where they will make sense, but for now they're a mystery to me. This happens a lot. When I write it's a lot like I'm transcribing something for someone else. Like they're narrating the tale to me. It's Legion messing with my mind again. I know it. Giving me only bits and pieces here and there, knowing that the not-knowing will drive me insane.

Maybe I'd be better suited to writing short stories...or greeting cards. Oh the horror! Never mind. Forget I said that. Greeting cards...*shudder*, I know I'd go insane then.

On that note I think I'll go try to fix the hole darian's death has left in my novel. Oh god...greeting cards...I may have nightmares tonight about that...

"Sometimes it's enough just to write the letter...even when you know no one is going to read it. " - Rev Bem, from Andromeda